2 Goals Met

--Tom Granger's Hand--(finished 4/30)

--Lip-Smacking Monkeys--(finished 4/25)



That still leaves the crit, which I hope to finish tonight. maybe.

The End Could Be in Sight

Maybe. I've been working on the 2nd draft of 'Dream On', which takes place after Joel's return to whatever the name of the town is. Topeka, I guess. It appears to be gearing up for an emotional confrontation with his father, who is in the hospital after suffering a heart attack. It might be too quick, though, but the important thing is to get it down, and then I can go back and add all the rest of the stuff. Maybe even combine 'Only You' with it. Who knows? All I know is that I need to finish this story, because these characters won't leave me alone. I think about them all the time, imagining what they will do next, etc.

~need to finish 'Glory Hand' and think of a different name by the end of the month.
~need to print off GOR's story and start crit, to be done by end of month.
~must write 500 words every day
~must finish 'Lip-Smacking Monkeys' by next Thursday

ohmygosh My character has a theme song!

i've been listening to this song by apoptygma berzerk, "unicorn" and today I looked up the lyrics.

"You hold the candle I once lit

You shine your light

When you forgive I cry

You run your fingers through my hair

And tell me it´s worthwhile,

it´s all worthwhile

Even when I hate myself

Even when I feel your pain

when you cry

Even when my heart is cold

You assure me it´s worthwhile,

it´s all worthwhile

You see what can´t be seen

You repair the damage done to me.."

And the tune....wow. The song is Joel, all his pain and angst and sorrow and hopelessness. Yet there's that little bit of hope, that tiny bit of light shining from her...which would be Cassie. This song is their relationship.

Now I Think I'll Try This!

Geeze. Now I'm thinking of going back to my original version of 'Only You' because I like Joel so much better. And Cassie, too, I guess. So I will combine the 2 versions and keep what I like from both. Besides, the first version is 40,000 words! Gotta be some good stuff in there, dontcha think?

Today I printed off 'Waiting For August' from my port on Writing.com. Ugh. My gosh, and to think I once thought it was good. Or at least okay. I'm looking at it today, going 'Yech!' It does have potential, this is true, and it is only a first draft, so maybe I'm being unfair. After all, I wrote it three years ago. I know my writing's improved since then.

'Waiting For August' is the story of Mel, a teenage girl who has been told by her mother all her life that her twin brother died at birth. After being dumped on a grandmother whom she's never met for a week, she discovers a mysterious scrapbook in a closet. Inside are pictures of Mel as a baby--and the brother she was told died. Determined to get to the bottom of the mystery, Mel embarks on a journey for the truth--a truth she may not want to know.

See? Potential. There's a bit of romance and a subplot about mothers and daughters, too.

Not a bad little blurb there. I'm not sure I can compress 'Only You' into a paragraph, although I have been trying. I will have to work on it.

A Possible Solution

I'm going to try starting 'Only You' right at the main action--the car accident in which a character dies due to the actions of another. I'm hoping this will work. Before I was starting totally from scratch with Cassie's developing relationship with Joel, but that was going so slowly. Now I can start with them already having discovered their feelings for each other. I'm still not sure if Joel will be newly to town or a childhood friend of Derek's. Both scenarios have potential subplots to move the plot along, but I think having Joel well known to both Cassie and her family will work best.

I will not be presenting 'Only You' to my writing group; I won't let the girls read it either. I need some privacy to make this work. I can't do the story justice if I have to worry about the language and/or actions of my characters. Yes, yes, I know, one shouldn't worry about such things as a writer, but I still do.

The main thing is to get the story down, start to finish, and then worry about making sense and having all ends tied up, etc. Gotta tie up that internal editor and throw him in the basement. That is difficult sometimes. I read once about an author who writes and rewrites the same 500-600 words until they are perfect before moving on. I dont' think that is something I could do. Okay, I do it a little bit, you know, go back and edit something, but I try not to. It's detrimental to getting the story down. That has to be my main focus, to get the bare bones down and into some sort of cohesive and comprehensible story.

A Snag

Ugh. I should have known this would happen. It was going way too smoothly. 10k into 'Only You' (working title) and I can't get into Cassie's head. Argh. So I'm trying the multiple POV thing, but that's not that easy, either. Discouragement and frustration loom. Just once in my life I'd like to finish this damn story! There are so many different versions of this thing that I think I will go absolutely nutters if I can't develop it into a comprehensible story! I mean, CRAP!!!!!!!

But I can't give up. There's a story and there is a way to make it work. I will keep persevering, keep plugging away, keep writing crap until it happens. I just hope I won't be 96 before it does!

Birdsong

I will find birdsong
I will find you
Beneath a tree
Beside the flowers

In the garden
So peaceful and light
I will find birdsong
I will find you

This definitely drives home the point that I am NOT a poet, although I kind of like it. 'Birdsong' speaks to me somehow, reminding me of one of my characters. It's a word rife with emotion.